Honor Them

Verse of the day: Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you.”

Honor your father and your mother…what does it mean to honor our father and mother, and do we still have to do this? This was one of the commandments that Jesus confronted the scribes and Pharisees about when they tried to hold Him accountable for the disciples failing to wash their hands in accordance with their traditions. Jesus rebuked them in Matthew 15 because they failed to honor their fathers and mothers due to the traditions they had set, which overrode God’s commandment to honor their father and mother. God sees the role of the father and mother as so vital, and one that should be respected, that He included it in the Ten Commandments. Ephesians 6:1-3 reads, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: 3 “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” The word “honor” in this verse means, “to revere” “to prize” “to value”. This means that regardless of what we may think about our parents, as parents, we are to give them honor and respect as a father or mother because of their office in the family. God, in both the Old Testament and the New Testament, does not give this as a conditional command. Nowhere in God’s Word do we read, “Honor father and mother, except when…” I will say this, however, right up front, “We can honor our father and mother, but that does not mean that we must mimic their ungodly or unlawful behavior.” We are called to obey them, as children, but we are not called to do as they do, if they are living ungodly lives. Ezekiel 20:18-19 tells us, “But I said to their children in the wilderness, ‘Do not walk in the statutes of your fathers, nor observe their judgments, nor defile yourselves with their idols. 19 I am the LORD your God: Walk in My statutes, keep My judgments, and do them…” This, however, does not say that we must not honor them. The reality of life, and being human, is that we did not have perfect parents, and we will not be perfect parents. God already knew this when He gave the Israelites, and us, the command to honor our parents. We are all sinners, whether we are a parent or a child, we all sin. As children, if we are to honor our parents, even as adults, it means that we must be able to forgive quite often (Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:13). One of the saddest things I have seen, even in the local church, is when a marriage goes bad, and even ends in divorce, and the local church, Christians, and the parties that were married, in their attempts to “discipline” whomever they felt caused the break-up, in the process, pit the children against one parent or the other. I say, “Shame on anyone who leads children to dishonor a father or mother, regardless of the reason for the break-up of that family.” As children, our responsibility, as Christians, is to forgive, and honor both our father and mother, and, as best we can, and maintain a relationship with both father and mother that honors God. This is always easier to do when Christian parents stay together for a lifetime, and raise their family together; but the sad reality of today is that we, as Christians, live in, or know of, Christian homes that have been divided by abuse, separation, and divorce (for a number of different reasons). So what do we do in those instances? Do our Christian principles, and God’s commands, no longer apply because of brokenness in the family unit? God expects us to honor both our father and mother, regardless of what the circumstances might be. It may mean that we have to show forgiveness toward one parent or another, or both. Yet, this is what God expects of us as His children. As children, we honor our parents by being obedient to them, and showing them respect (Colossians 3:20); for this is pleasing to the LORD. As adult children we honor them by showing them respect, and taking care of them when they can no longer take care of themselves. The same way we seek to honor God with our word, actions and thoughts, is the same way we should seek to honor our parents. In both the Old Testament, and the New Testament, we are reminded that honoring father and mother is the first commandment with promise. God promised that if we honor both our parents, He will honor us with long life. The bottom line is that there is no excuse before God, which is acceptable, when we choose to dishonor our parents.

Today, God extends an invitation to you to accept His free gift of salvation (Rom 6:23). Will you accept it? Anyone who calls on Jesus, by faith, in repentance, confessing your sins, will receive eternal life. Do not put off calling on Him, and receive Him and His free gift of salvation today (Rom 10:13).